When Destinee was born she was a twin. However Zita kept this a secret from the world, and put the other twin up for adoption. This was because at the time society mores dictated that to have twins was terribly unfashionable. But now the woman standing in Zita's living room is claiming to be that long lost twin. How can this be?! She looks like White Trash and says her name is Courtnee Lamark how distasteful! She says she has come to claim what is rightfully hers. Zita's body goes rigid with shock and she collapses.

Mercifully missing the drama, Stacey Jo, Destinee's child has been sent away by Zita to 'Fat Brat Camp' for the under 5's. The camp is run by a charismatic man called 'White Wind Who Runs With Ferrets'. The children are told to pull heavily laden ponies all day if they want to eat that night. White Wind looks on cursing to himself. The fact that he is on duty means that he will miss his 'Embroidery Orientation' class. Damn!

Meanwhile Tad has almost forgotten about his search for his wife Destinee. He has unwittingly joined a cult, of which Moonflower is a member. The cult is performing a mass wedding ceremony, which is being officiated over by the Reverend Loon-ee. Tad refuses to take part but has obligingly gone to fetch Moonflower's handbag for her. As he rushes up to Moonflower, he realises too late that the final words of the ceremony were being uttered. He now finds himself having unwittingly become a bigamist! What will Destinee say when he finally finds her?

Zita has been persuaded to go out for the evening by her friend Diaspora. All Zita's friends are very worried about her. She is uncharacteristically unsociable and is obviously suffering from 'Hair Standing on End' syndrome, but refuses to talk about it. Diaspora has brought a date for Zita He's only 23 and is an infamous gigolo with amazing restorative powers for the mature woman. His name is Lorenzo Compostella di Meringue.